Your friends all wear black to your birthday party

Your boss is younger than you are

You're not sure if you have freckles or age spots

You are chosen poster child for mid-life crisis

You finally stop waiting for your baby fat to disappear

Your back goes out more often than you do

The gleam in your eye is the sun reflecting off your bifocals

You get gray hair from worrying about your teeth falling out

The styles you wore in high school make a comeback called the "Nostalgic Look"

There's more hair stuck in the drain than on your head

Your knees buckle,but your belt won't

You're kids describe someone as "old"and then add,"You know,about your age"

Your entire wardrobe has elastic waistbands

You regret all those times you resisted temptation

Your definintion of old advances with age

You finally get it all together,and you can't remember where you put it

The law of gravity takes on new meaning.